Monday, August 23, 2010

Piece of Advice #65: Aim higher than prostitution

Seriously.  You can do it.  You have it in you to be more than just a paid hole to plug.

It used to be that all women acknowledged the truth that prostitution was the vocation of last resort. All other avenues being closed to you, your family dead or having turned you off, no money, no skills, no friends, no strings to pull, that's when you wound up on the street.  Because if you didn't have anything else, you always had your vagina, and someone would pay to use it.  It was a way to stay alive, but it was the last stop before checking out, and women dealt with it mostly by drinking or drugging so much they were out of their minds when they had to perform their work duties.

Now it seems prostitution or one of its sister jobs, stripping and pornography, is viewed by some young women as a first step on the ladder to success.  No longer is it demeaning to spread your legs for strangers.  Now it's empowering.  It gets you noticed.  It gets your foot in the door.

Last week news broke that Laurence Fishburne's daughter, Montana, was getting her leg up via pornography.  Some quotes:
"[My dad] is very upset. I heard that he's mad at me but I haven't spoken to him yet," Montana Fishburne, 19, told TMZ.com, adding that her famous father is "very hurt" over her decision to star in an X-rated flick.

But Montana - who also goes by the name "Chippy D" - thinks she'll be able to work her way back into the "Matrix" star's good graces. "I feel pretty confident that I can work things out with him," she told the gossip Web site. Montana even thinks her dad might eventually get behind her new career move. "I think he wants to support me in everything I do," she said, "and though he sees this now as a negative, I believe in time he will view it as a positive."

Although Montana told TMZ she didn't warn her dad about her steamy career move, she said she plans to meet with him soon to explain her motives.

"I've watched how successful Kim Kardashian became and I think a lot of it was due to the release of her sex tape," Montana said in a press release from Vivid Entertainment. "I'm hoping the same magic will work for me. I'm impatient about getting well-known and having more opportunities and this seemed like a great way to get started on it."
A few thoughts:

  • Any job that requires you to take a stage name like "Chippy D" is a bad idea.  A BAD idea.  
  • Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton are not role models.  They are screwed up kids from rich families who have made money because watching them makes regularly dysfunctional people feel superior.  And everyone likes to feel superior.  No one should view a leaked sex tape as an opportunity.  It should be the cue that your life is so off target that the honorable routes open to you are suicide or volunteer penal colony hard labor supervised by nuns.  
  • Montana is delusional that her father will ever get behind this career.  He may still love her, but being proud of her is now pretty much out the window.  Who can be proud knowing you have a stupid, slutty attention whore short-cut taker for a daughter?  
I know I've said before that given no boundaries people will act like animals and go for short-term gratification over dignity, integrity and long-term success, but it baffles me how we as young women could go from wanting to be doctors to wanting to be strippers in just one or two generations.  I mean, come on!  Sex work is the opposite of empowering.  No one respects you, and your "power" is ephemeral, lasting only as long as it takes for whoever you are working for to get off.

Mothers, if you see any sign that your daughters are starting to glorify the pole, it's time to shut down all access to the outside world and enroll them in convent school.  Cloistered convent school.  There will always be girls who make terrible decisions that put them on the slow (or quick) slide to the bottom.  Some girls are full of self-loathing and will choose this to get them the life they feel they deserve.  But to see girls with everything - girls like Miley and Montana Fishburne - embrace pornography and lap-dancing is a sign of the end times.  The end of our civilization.  

16 comments:

  1. female beauty is rare and fleeting. in a very atomistic and economically free society it seems the sex trades--porn, stripping, escorts--have actually become the most economically efficient way of rationing SOME sexual access to a scarce commodity "young, slim, beautiful women" among a HUGE unprecedented mass of single men RIGHT at a time when many young women are making themselves unpalatable by being fat, ugly and shrewish.

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  2. "But to see girls with everything - girls like Miley and Montana Fishburne - embrace pornography and lap-dancing is a sign of the end times. The end of our civilization."

    Spot on, Grerp. Just so.

    Prostitutes in olden days had fewer illusions about the life they'd chosen. I've read that when some women rode the trains out from eastern to western Canada to ply that 'trade' (as the West was opening up), that many brought a nice white wedding dress in the bottom of the big steamer trunks carrying all their worldly possessions, not because they expected to ever get married, but so they'd at least have something nice to be buried in.

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  3. I hate to say it, but dana is right.

    It pays, it really does. I have no religious problems with it, but I do wish it didn't pay so much and seem so easy. Some high class escorts get paid well and live a relatively dignified life. Plus to be a courtesan is a skill, and often requires one to acquire things such as manners and second languages and the ability to make relatively chaste or business attire look sexy at the same time.

    Pole dancing? Stripping? Bah.
    Clarence

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  4. I'm amazed at just how stupid this girl is.

    She says she wants to get well known. Her father is an a-list actor recognizable across the planet, but apparently this fact isn't useful to her.

    So she goes to vivid, hoping that becoming a bona fide porn star will make her dreams of mainstream fame and fortune come true. Kardashian and Hilton released sex tapes-this girl planned this and got herself contracted in advance as a legit pornstar. There is a big difference, but apparently she can't see it.

    Then she talks about wanting to pull a Sasha Grey(big time pornstar who crossed into mainstream recently). That to is ridiculous, as any casual observation of this girl in interview will make it clear that she doesn't have anywhere NEAR the level of intellect Sasha does. She comes across as an immature, spoiled, slutty and foolish little girl. Sasha comes across as a surprisingly confident, articulate and well read seductress(with a wild streak, a evidence by her porn career). This is the difference between ending up on Entourage every week and fading into obscurity as another pretty but forgettable "video ho".

    Then she goes and does these videos using her real identity, forever associating the reputation of her father's name(something he worked pretty hard to build as a young black actor way back in the day before anyone cared) with smut. It almost seems like she's trying to get back at him. Maybe she's just bi-polar.

    If my daughter did this, I would disown her.
    This may sound hypocritical given my status as a porn consuming american teenager, but I really don't care. Any daughter of mine(let alone one with the type of wealth and opportunity this girl grew up with) stupid enough to pull a stunt like this can piss off until she comes to her senses.

    Speaking of hypocrisy, even former porn stars and actual adult film directors and industry execs have gone on record as saying that they don't want their kids to get into the business if they can help it. If they can see it, I really don't see why anyone else can't.

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  5. First time posting, =] hello!

    I'd like to say, I take a neutral stance regarding women who choose to go into the "sex trades" for economical reasons. I can't say whether its right or wrong in the case of finances, because the lure of big pay offs in that industry are VERY difficult to ignore for girls who grow up without the chance of ever accessing the lifestyle they'll have because of the type of money offered in that industry. Unless of course they marry rich, or have the intellect and discipline to become doctors, lawyers etc.

    This is America after all, the majority of us want a nice car, a piece of land, decent retirement plans, and expendable cash. If a girl comes from a poor family, and isn't the sharpest tool in the shed, her options to be apart of this "American Dream" are very slim.

    My stance on Montana is the girl has a goal in mind, and she's going after it with everything she's got. I do think its sad to want to be recognized so badly she's willing to tarnish her Father's reputation. Who wants to be the father of a porn star? I really want to go off into the poor little rich girl scenario, but money can't buy fame and that is what she's after. Her way of going about it is shady, but you can't knock the girl for taking the risk, especially with the success of the Fame Whore Trailblazers, Kim and Paris.

    If she doesn't ever become a famous actor, she will probably be a well known porn star, she is Laurence Fishburne's daughter after all.....oh man how embaressing, I feel really bad for the guy :-/

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  6. Her way of going about it is shady, but you can't knock the girl for taking the risk, especially with the success of the Fame Whore Trailblazers, Kim and Paris.

    Why the dickens not? I sure knock those two for being useless wastes of perfectly good oxygen.

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  7. Even if a person is enough of a doctrinaire relativist non-judgmentalist that they can rationalize away Ms. Chippy D's decision as morally unproblematic, I think it's impossible for anybody to truly respect her.

    To respect someone, they must do something impressive or difficult. They have to exhibit mental strength to overcome hardship or the temptation to sell out. What we have here is a woman who has decided to take the path of absolute least resistance just to buy some fame, and who is self-consciously going for the same cheap brand of fame as one of America's least-respectable famous women.

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  8. Just part of our love/hate/hypocritical relationship with porn in America. On the one hand, there's plenty of people (esp. guys, admit it!) who enjoy and use porn/possibly sex workers in their lives, but would die if their daughter consciously chose a porn or prostitution career. Every porn actress or hooker is someone's daughter, maybe your own someday. If you find that thought repulsive, don't be part of the problem.

    They can't sell what no one will buy.

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  9. I feel Montana's decisions are definitely morally problematic. I realize my statement not to "knock her" is a look on the bright side, optimistic approach, but that doesn't take away from the fact that the girl is just scandalous.

    There will ALWAYS be people who choose the other side, the easy way, or whatever you'd like to call it. I feel people who choose to take the "dark side" per say can't be judged by the same standards as people who choose the other route (assuming there are only two routes to take....)

    Montana is after the life of a fame whore, seeing that she admires the "success" of Kim...So my outlook is, damm!t, you better be the best fame whore the world has seen!

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  10. "Mothers, if you see any sign that your daughters are starting to glorify the pole..."

    Hey,hey,now. Plenty of people's daughters have glorified my pole over the years. Nothing wrong with that.

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  11. This will get tomatoes thrown at me (and I do not want that) - but:

    I live in an area near Reno NV, where prostitution is legal. I have some insights into this subject:

    "and women dealt with it mostly by drinking or drugging so much they were out of their minds when they had to perform their work duties"

    This is a misconception - people do not get into drugs because of the sex business, they get into the sex business because of drugs.

    The Sex business is a quick and easy buck for any junky (especially around these here parts). Reno has strip-clubs, porno-clubs, and outside of it are brothels. Junkies will seek employment from these places to get a quick buck - what other skills does a junkie have?

    I have known too many "squares" that got into the business with no addictions at all. Yes, growing up, it surprised me - which women became prostitutes (I knew one women who became a worker in a brother - and nobody "picked" her, so she had to call her parents to "bail her out" - that is, the brothels run all kinds of medical tests on the woman (and bills), and she has to pay those off - by working - the brothels also charge money for the room they work in).

    I agree with the rest of your article. However; I think that the "empowering" aspect of stripping, hooking etc... comes not from a misconception of the career being "dignified", but rather the "power" these women seem to have over the men that patronize such establishments. Like lap-dogs, these men throw money away or at such women.

    These women are under the misguided impression that having such control over men (their customers) is somehow "empowering".

    That may be true, but IMO, it's a disgusting way to have power over anybody.

    Chuck your tomatoes now!!!!

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  12. ScareCrow - no tomatoes. I believe you. I do think, though, back in the day women got pushed into prostitution for purely economic reasons and drank or drugged to get through it. Of course, there has always been an enormous difference between the conditions of high class prostitutes (courtesans, mistresses, etc.) and street prostitutes. I can believe some women get into the former just for the money and the perks. I'd still advise young women to aim higher.

    I agree with you that this is an unpalatable kind of power.

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  13. What Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian did was bad, and lowering of public standards. However this girl appears to be too dim to realize what she's doing is way worse and isn't likely to give her the bad girl but admired by many fame that those do did, did.

    Paris and Kardashian "somehow had sex videos leaked on the internet". That's how it first and for a long time appeared. Further the sex was with their boyfriends at the time. (Actually in Paris Hilton's case it does appear that it was her former bf who leaked it - she won a legal judgment against him on that basis. Kardashian's case is less clear. Both of them capitalized on the release though, and became brazen about it.

    What Laurence Fishburne's daughter, Montana, has apparently done is become a porn whore, literally. She has sex with strangers she's not necessarily attracted to and certainly not in a relationship with, for money. While there's a thin slice of the mostly male and probably radical feminist community that's ok with this in someone they'd take seriously other than as a mastubatory aid or potential slut/whore pump and dump, the vast majority won't think that makes her edgie hot. Rather lowdown whorey. Even in this feminist culture.

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  14. I don't even feel like getting married and having children anymore. What kind of culture is this to raise them in? And who the hell wants to marry any of these used women. Only a deranged man is happy with someone who has been with someone else, but some obviously have to settle due to the general trash available today. Hell could not be worse. Damn liberals and their lack of wisdom.

    "When orthodoxy is optional, it will sooner or later be proscribed" - Neuhaus Law

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  15. Does she not expect that she will want a long term boyfriend or husband some day and that this will repel a lot of men?

    I feel bad for Morpheus and all the embarrassment this will cause him.

    I find it weird that everyone here is assuming that feminists are cool with all this.

    UK feminist Natasha Walter has written a book about this phenomenon of fetishizing the sex trades:

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2010/jan/25/natasha-walter-feminism-sexism-return

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